Eeeek! A MAN!

I went to get a manicure and pedicure today... I haven't had one in ages because I've been trying to save money... But my poor hands and feet were suffering and so I went, spur of the moment to the friendly little nail shop near my house. As I was rolling up my jeans I realized that I hadn't shaved recently... I was totally embarrassed and apologized profusely but the girl said it wasn't bad (then she said something in Vietnamese to the girl next to her and they laughed but I'll try not to be paranoid here!) and I relaxed as the chair started massaging away my woes. The THE MAN came in. All decked out in Golferman clothes. Lots of gold jewelry and VERY white teeth. He had something to say to everyone in the shop... What a friendly man he was. He sat at table 1 and got a complete manicure. I sat there in my massage chair and watched him the sneaky way- using the mirrors. What kind of man gets his nails done? Male hand models? That would be acceptable to me I suppose. I listened to him chat aways like a girl, getting all involved in the town gossip. He didn't act gay, in fact, he had his 12 year old daughter there with him. She had her nails done in dark purple, dad opted for clear. I guess this man was a Metrosexual? Is that what its called? I prefer my men to do their nails themselves, like my father always has, using manly nail utensils such as a pocket knife, toothpick, and giant toenail clippers. Then there's always the Improv Style... Biting and spitting. That's the manly man way. I like the manly man way. I don't get my hair done at the barber shop... I really don't want men in my beauty shop or nail salon, seeing the whole secret beauty process! I wonder if this man's buddies knows he frequents girlie nail shops? Do they sit around the table on Tuesday Poker Night admiring each other's hands? Holy crap! What is this world coming to? Men should have clean but rough hands if you ask me... manly hands. Actually, I don't even mind a little grease under the nails... but that's me... Mechanic hands excite me... Big rough strong mechanic hands with mechanic muscles... You know, forearm muscles like Popeye had. Tattoos are optional. I will never be attracted to a metrosexual. My man will not cry in public except on 3 occasions: when his Mother dies; when his dog dies; and when his team comes from behind, beats all odds and wins it all. Yep... I'm afraid manly men are going the way of the dinosaurs. Such a shame.